


Love, Deryah || Blaise Zabini

by aweasleysbaby



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Character(s) of Color, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Hemophobia, Hogwarts, Love Letters, Ravenclaw Harry Potter, Romance, Slytherin Harry Potter, Wizarding World (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:53:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29338626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aweasleysbaby/pseuds/aweasleysbaby
Summary: "did you really mean what you wrote in that letter about me?" he whispered against my lips.reader discretion is advised. certain chapters may be for mature audiences, so I will put a warning before the chapters.rights of harry potter characters go towards their original creator; j.k rowling (even though we don't stan her)Rights of onyx de loughrey and Lorenzo Berkshire go towards @babynaomi
Relationships: Blaise Zabini/Original Female Character(s), Pansy Parkinson/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 9





	1. 🖤

**Author's Note:**

> this is for those of you who came here from wattpad and tiktok. as you know, wattpad is taking down stories with explicit or mature content. so i will be posting on here until this chaos dies over.

**F E A T U R I N G**  
  
  


_CHADWICK BOSEMAN AS_ **_LAFAYETTE FONTAINE_ **

  
  
  
  
_LUPITA NYONG'O AS_ **_ELIZABETH FONTAINE_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_ELLA AS_ **_DERYAH FONTAINE_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_LOUIS CORDICE AS_ **_BLAISE ZABINI_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_TOM FELTON AS_ **_DRACO MALFOY_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_ODEYA RUSH AS_ **_ONYX DE LOUGHREY_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_LOUIS PARTRIDGE AS_ **_LORENZO BERKSHIRE_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_SCARLETT BYRNE AS_ **_PANSY PARKINSON_ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
_hello darlings,_

_thank you for choosing this book! i'm so excited to see what you guys think of this book and to hear your feedback. if you don't already know, i also have my other weasley fan fiction and i will work my hardest to update these books frequently. i just ask that you bare with me because i'm juggling school as well._

_to be honest, this book was a light bulb idea. don't laugh, but i came up with the idea for this while i was shopping in walgreen's. (lol feel free to clown me) i didn't know how to start it, so please be nice about the prologue. i have ideas of how i want the ending to go whether it be cliche or a twist. just expect to be upset, angry, or maybe even cry. i'm not gonna beat around the bush, i want to fvck with your emotions hardcore. like i want you to genuinely feel what the main character's are feeling. also, this story will contain a lot of sensitive content, so triggers will be posted in the chapters that contain such material._

**_this book won't traditionally follow the books, but i will try to blend little scenes from the movies. also, i didn't didn't really want to follow it because we already know the story and it wouldn't be that fun._** _other than that, it will be on my own story line. i am always open to constructive criticism! also, at the end of each chapter, there will be a space for discussing what you guys might want to see happen between the characters! so don't be afraid to speak your mind._

_all rights and crediting goes to dobby; the free elf ;) but onyx and lorenzo go to @-babynaomi and that just leaves the fontaine family to me :)_

_i'm not going to say that this is and enemies to lovers, nor will i say slow burn, just know that they won't be so fond of each other in the beginning. we'll call it "classmates to lovers" lol._

_please remember to vote and comment! every vote counts and definitely means the world to me._

_social// tiktok: aweasleys._girl ~ ig: sunkissed.lover_ or swaggyfeet583_

_also y'all should give ella a follow because she deserves it ;) (also i wouldn't have a main character either)_

_tiktok: _ellaweasleyx__  
  


_without further adieu, i give you_

**_L O V E, D E R Y A H | B L A I S E Z A B I N I_ **


	2. prologue

deryah, an outspoken, intelligent, generous ravenclaw; finest in all her classes. she was a strong believer in endless possibilities and wouldn't let anything get in her way; that's what made her so admirable; unlike like most teenagers her age, she had an old soul. instead of socializing and going to parties in the common rooms, she spent her weekends cooped up in a cozy corner of the library or running through a field with the blessings of nature. she was so in touch with the universe, everyone was sure she had been the reincarnation of mother nature in physical form.

now, here she stood, standing in her washroom, gazing at the reflection in front of her. deryah had never really favored her mix of toffee and mocha colored skin. she never deemed herself unappealing, but she wouldn't go as far to say that she was attractive. no matter how many times her parents told she was beautiful, it didn't sink in. she believed as though they were obligated to say such things. something had been engraved in her mind, making her feel like she needed more. she wanted to find that missing puzzle piece.

a small knock on the door invaded her train of thought. her mother walked in and stood tall behind her, taking in their reflections. she noticed the look on deryah's face, she had been doing _it_ again. whenever deryah didn't feel too satisfied about her appearance, she made her way to the mirror. she'd stand there, going on hours until she found something new to convince herself that it made her less pretty. she'd stopped everything she was doing, and figure out ways to make it right. she'd manifest confidence, a blooming, anything to take her mind off the 'flaw'. 

removing the cloak of silence, her mother decided to speak up. "your father and i are so appreciative of how far you've come my darling." she placed her hands on deryah's shoulder. "you are the first ravenclaw in a family full of pureblood slytherins." her mother spoke the truth. she was the very first ravenclaw in a family full of slytherins; this meant that deryah was easily underestimated. relatives doubted her and put her down all the time, saying she wasn't worthy of being a pureblood. even her parents doubted her abilities of magic at times, but she didn't let that stop her. she aimed to prove them all wrong.

"i remember the very first letter you sent home during your first year. there were tear blotches all over the bloody parchment." her mother spoke, causing her to chuckle at the childish memory. "you were so frightened to be placed in ravenclaw. you didn't know anyone, and you had no friends. but that didn't trouble you much. you cared about what your father and i were going to do." she pursued.

deryah placed a hand on top of her mother's and smiled softly. "yeah, i was so distraught and anxious, that i could've sworn i spotted a gray hair or two." she joked, causing her mother to titter softly.

"even then deryah, you did your best to validate that you were sorted into the right house. you always find a way to make that star of yours radiate the brightest light. i'm so honored to call you my daughter."

that being said, her mother pulled a small box from her lounging robe. she unlatched the small box, and showed it to her daughter. deryah let out an inaudible gasp. her mother took the silver chain, placed it around her neck, and clasped it shut. it had a small star shaped charm on it. though it may have been modest, it meant the world coming from her mother. deryah's vision began to blur as the salty liquids filled her eyes. it felt so nourishing to hear such welcoming words come from her mother. she spun to face her mother and pulled her into a hug. while pulling away from the embrace, her mother placed a small kiss on her cheek.

"you only have two years left, make the most of them. but remember something deryah-" her mother placed a hand on her chin; raising it to her level.

"yes mother?" she hummed, questioning her softly.

"-always hold your head up. you should be proud of yourself."

those words echoed in her head and played repeatedly. these words engraved themselves into her mind, and would stick with her forever.


	3. The Deal

_i present to you..._

**_the deal_ **   
  


**_narrator's pov_ **

**The Night Before She Returns Back for Her Sixth Year**

as she lay in the grass under her favorite willow tree, deryah watched the sun tuck back under the horizon, leaving streaks of rose and tangerine behind. as the moon soon took its place, deryah realized, as the summer was coming to an end; so was her childhood. her father would be expecting her to turn into a young woman and let go of her childish pastime with nature. she sighed and turned to fiddle with the leaves softly drooping from crooked tree. "at least i got to spend it with you old friend" she spoke, running her fingers across the bark. she exhaled as she rose from the grass, retrieving her journal and flower crown from the grass; making her way towards her homestead.

forgetting to clean her feet from the mud that made its way between her toes, deryah tracked a trail of mud through the halls. once she caught sight of the mess she created, she sent apologies to charlotte; the free elf. "i am so sorry! i had no idea you were cleaning the floors today." she spoke with sincerity.

"don't worry miss, i didn't get to these rooms yet; no worries." she said dismissing her.

after being dismissed, she quietly ran past her father's study in an attempt to be as quiet as possible, until she heard a firm voice call out for her.

"deryah-" she froze in her path. groaning softly, deryah made her way back and stood at the entrance of his study.

"good evening father,"

he lifted his head and scanned his daughter. "were you out by that blasted tree again?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow. he had placed his book down and was now grasping a glass of firewhiskey that once sat idle on his desk.

"yes father," deryah now held her head to the ground and fiddled with her fingers.

"we've talked about this before deryah. you've got to get out of these foolish ways if you ever expect to be courted." thing the was, deryah didn't want to be courted just yet. she wanted to spend the rest of her school days, stretching her childhood as long as she could. when it was time for her womanhood, it would come naturally. she didn't want to be hurried into seeking a husband.

"who says i want to be courted just yet?" she muttered, causing her father to snap up from his chair.

"speak up when you talk to me," he spoke sternly. deryah didn't reply, nor did she attempt to look up at him. this caused her father to become easily irritated. he harshly slammed the glass onto his desk causing an echo to carry through the study. "i said speak up when you speak to me!" he shouted, raising the volume in his voice even more. he now stood over his desk with his arms spread to either side. deryah flinched, quickly lifting her head, not daring to make eye contact with her father, even though she felt as his dark brown eyes on her as they bore in her direction.

he was brought out of his gaze, as he looked over to see his wife in her robe, with her arms folded. she had a stern but blank expression on her face. "what's going on?" she spoke firmly. "why can i hear you from my library?" she looked annoyed and disturbed. **eliza fontaine** _loathed_ being disturbed when it came to her reading and tranquility.

she grabbed a glass, poured herself a drink, and made her way over to a vacant armchair and sat down; crossing her legs. the study was now very silent as they watched her settle down. eliza looked between the two and raised her eyebrow. "well, are you going to speak? i'm waiting," she took a sip of her drink and her husband exhaled.

"liz, i was telling your daughter that in order for her to get courted, she needs to stop messing around in the wilderness with that rubbish of a willow tree-"

"the tree isn't rubbish!" deryah shouted, intercepting his words. eliza cocked her head in her daughter's direction. she lifted a finger, gesturing for her daughter to wait her turn.

"let your father finish first" she turned her attention back to her husband, and he proceeded to explain.

"in order for her to properly enter her womanhood, she needs to be more mannered. or for merlin's sake, at least stop playing in the mud! look at her feet liz, she left a whole bloody trail!" as he finished speaking, eliza's eyes shifted to her daughter's feet.

eliza couldn't help but let out a snort. "bloody hell deryah, did you take a mud bath or something?!" she broke into laughter while her husband clenched his jaw. he did not find this humorous, nor did he find it comedic. deryah let a giggle fall from her lips, but quickly hid it with a clearing of her throat. after eliza regained control of herself, she turned to address her daughter. "what did you say to your father that made him raise his voice?" deryah lifted her head and spoke firmly.

"i told my father, that what if i didn't want to be courted yet."

lafayette sneered "you mean you mumbled-" he interrupted.

"lafayette, you had your turn, now let her speak" eliza reprimanded in a solid voice. lafayette scoffed and plopped down in his armchair; like a child. "continue darling." eliza spoke returning her attention to her daughter.

"i want to lengthen the two years i have left before i get pushed into marrying someone or being told to get rid of my 'childish' habits. and besides, why can't i marry someone i genuinely love? that's what you and mom did!"

"deryah, that's different and you know it-" lafayette sighed.

"why?! oh wait, because i'm a ravenclaw right?!!" she shouted.

"YES!" lafayette snapped.

deryah wasn't even taken aback by his response. if she wasn't so riled up, she would be able to acknowledge the now pierced skin in the folds of her palms caused by her nails.

eliza let out an audible gasp and snapped her head to her husband "lafay-"

before eliza could even finish her sentence, deryah stormed out his study ran up the stairs to her bedroom.

eliza was now, not only annoyed, but very frustrated with her husband. deciding to not to create more collision by getting him more riled up, she walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder.

he grazed his hand past hers, letting it rest on top of hers. "liz, i know what you're going to say-"

"you mean that you were wrong for disturbing my reading time? then, yes you do know me very well."

lafayette let out a chuckle and brought his wife onto his lap. "i'm sorry for that as well, love," eliza placed a kiss on his cheek and he continued. "she just makes me worry sometimes. i just don't want her to get stuck in those clouds of hers."

"yes, i get it love, but you have to remember, she has feelings too. and besides, she gets her stubbornness from you," eliza spoke, fiddling with her husband's fingers

"no, she doesn't."

"but she does," eliza continued. "you both have strong points, but remember what happened when we were younger. i was just like her; you were too. we both wanted love, but the _right_ way."

 _light bulb!_ eliza shot her head towards her husband and made a humming noise. "honey, do you remember that deal you made with you father?"

"there were several, i need you to be more specific-"

" _THE_ deal, love"

"y-yes, i do remember that-"

 ** _the deal;_** ever since lafayette was a boy, he absolutely _despised_ the idea of arranged marriages with people he didn't love. but, because he was soon to become a man, he had no other way to get out of it. he begged and pleaded with father, until his father became annoyed. his father gave him a deal. if he found someone of good standards ( **pureblood** and **slytherin** ) to marry, he wouldn't arrange him with anyone. but if he didn't, his father would set him up with someone from his own choice.

drawing him from his thoughts, eliza spoke out. "so, why don't you try that with her?"

"do you think she'll oblige?"

"if you haven't noticed, she will do anything to marry for love- just give her chance"

lafayette pulled his wife into a kiss before she arose from his lap.

"just think about it while i go talk to our daughter."

he nodded his head and pulled a piece of parchment out of his desk. lafayette fontaine had a plan.  
  
  


*****

deryah was sorting through her trunk making sure she packed everything she needed for her next year at hogwarts. breaking the silence, there was a knock at her door.

"come in-" she spoke, not caring enough to look at the door behind her.

the door slowly opened, and deryah shifted her eyes to see her mother peaking her head in. not wanting to hear anything, she disagreed before her mother could even breathe.

"if you're here to speak on his behalf-" she started.

"i'm not, actually. i came to see what you were feeling." eliza cut in.

deryah placed her now packed trunk, near her bedside, and took a seat next to her mother.

"mom, he says he's 'proud of me', but he won't stop holding the fact that i'm in ravenclaw, over my head. i know he's secretly disappointed. besides, it's not like i _chose_ to be ravenclaw. "

eliza listened to her daughter carefully. some part of her deep down, knew deryah was telling the truth. her husband was raised in a household with parents less lenient than hers. he may not have believed in blood superiority, but he felt that way about the houses. he loved his daughter, but he wished that'd she'd, in some miraculous way, be resorted into slytherin.

"darling, before you think i'm invalidating your anger, and what you're feeling, i'm not." eliza spoke up. "you know your father was raised in an old fashioned family. as to where my parents, were more open-minded. he is still learning to change his outlook and perspective on certain things."

deryah huffed and brought her head to her mother's shoulder. once again, she found herself feeling bad for her father, when it _should_ be the other way around. "i understand mom, i just wish he would try harder to understand where i'm coming from. he, himself, _hated_ the idea, so why enforce it on me? my house shouldn't matter. my blood status shouldn't matter. but for some screwed up reason, it does." she said, raising her voice in the slightest.

not knowing what to say, eliza said what came to mind. "i will talk to him, i promise. he'll come around soon. i have a feeling."

deryah exhaled in exhaustion and lifted her head from her mother's shoulder. "let's hope he does."

eliza rose from the bed placing a kiss on her daughter's forehead. "i love you, get some rest. tomorrow is a big day." she stepped out of her daughter's bedroom, closed her door, and made her way back to the library.  
  
  


**lafayette's pov**   
  
  


i pulled the parchment from my desk and began to think. i needed to apologize; eliza was right. i grabbed my quill, and began to write.  
  
  


_deryah,_

_i know i've upset you with my words. i'm sorry, but i would like to propose a deal._

_i understand that you loathe the idea of arranged marriages; as did i at your age. being truly in love is the best warmth you could ever experience, and i sincerely apologize for trying to strip you of the privilege. please forgive me._

_now for the deal._

_you have two years left for your schooldays at hogwarts. you can spend those two years, finding someone to love. if you find someone, i will allow you to marry for love. there are no requirements; only that you love them wholeheartedly. yes, that does include blood status and house placements. if no one has peaked your interest, then you must accept your fate._

_i know it doesn't seem like it, but i'm rooting for you,_

_dad_


	4. The Boy on the Train

_i present to you..._  
  
  


**_the boy on the train_ **  
  


**_deryah's pov_ **

as i said goodbye to my mom, i went into an embrace with my dad. before i could pull away, he placed an envelope in my hand, and whispered into my ear.

 _"don't open this until after dinner."_ i stared at him in confusion before responding with a slight nod. i backed away, saying my final farewells to them, before grasping my trunk, and boarding the train.

***

looking for a cabin was always the most challenging part about the ride to hogwarts. everyone made sure their lot sat together, so it would be awkward for outsiders to share the same cabin. every cabin i had looked in, was either packed with nervous first years, people who had been mates for the longest, or worst of all; those who were snogging.

i was abruptly brought out of my thoughts, as i collided with the floor. _what the hell just happened?_ i looked up to see a tall, male figure standing in a black trench coat. his back was facing me, until he slowly rotated his body to face me.

"bloody hell, watch where your going-" he spat, watching me reach to gather my belongings.

"sorry, i wasn't paying attention." i spoke lightly. i grasped for my wand and trunk, arose from the floor.

"obviously, you weren't" he muttered, seemingly annoyed. not that i could blame him; i did just slam into him.

i readjusted my clothes and apologized once more. "once again, i'm really so-"

my words were cut short by the boy brushing past me and mumbling something under his breath. "yeah, i heard you before." he spoke indistinctly, as he walked away.

 _what the hell was his problem?_ "arsehole" i scoffed and my made way to an empty cabin.

***

after what felt like hours and hours, we finally arrived to the station. everyone grouped together, caught a carriage, and made their way to the castle. i was one of the last people to find a carriage. when i did, i greeted the same thestrals that always pulled them. "hello," just as i finished greeting them, i glanced over to see four students staring at me. a ginger, and three brunettes. the brunette girl, the brown haired boy with a plant, and the ginger, looked concerned, whilst the boy with glasses, didn't seem to mind. i supposed he was used to seeing the herd.

he came around and helped me climb onto the carriage. a girl with blonde hair was already seated and seemed to be reading something that was upside down. what a _unique_ way to read. she put her book down and looked over at the boy and i.

"i can see them too, you know. you're just as sane as i am." she had soft voice.

as the boy with glasses helped me climb onto the carriage, i nodded my head; sending her a soft smile. "thank you" i spoke to him. he gave a slight nod and humming sound.

when everyone got onto the carriage, the curly headed girl, began to converse. "everyone, this is loony love-" before she could finish, i snapped my head in her direction, giving her a mean glare. why the hell was everyone being so rude today? she cleared her throat and corrected herself. "luna lovegood."

i gave luna a smile and placed my hand out, to introduce myself. "well, i'm deryah fontaine, nice to meet you! that's a extraordinary necklace!" i said beaming.

she eagerly shook my hand and gave a unique introduction. "it's a charm actually- it's keeps away the nargles."

not knowing what nargles are, i decided to change the subject. "i'm starving, i hope they are serving something good; cheesecake hopefully."

"i hope there's pudding" luna chimed in.

***

shortly after i walked into my dorm, there was a soft knock. "coming." i walked over and swung the door open; it was luna. 

"oh hello there, you must be my new roommate"

"hi luna!" i opened the door wider, gesturing for her to enter.

she walked in, eyeing the room as she made her way to her four poster. she placed the book she was reading on the bed, and ran her finger across the empty bedside table. "would you feel comfortable if i were to hang some crystals around the room?" she questioned.

"no honestly, go for it. these walls are so bare. but first, we should get going for dinner, we don't want to be the last ones there." i reminded.

"okay, let's go!"

she put some of her things away, then we left the room. the halls were slightly warm and dimly lit; allowing the moonlight to shine a bit more prominently. there were groups of teens hanging around the entrance of the great hall, while others were making their ways in while holding their conversations.

as we entered the great hall, i looked over at luna, and she seemed to be lost in her thoughts. there was three empty spots at the ravenclaw table, so i gently tugged her, making our way over before anyone could take the spots. after we sat down, and food was served, there was a tap on my shoulder. i turned my body to see an average height boy with curly hair, and palish vanilla skin. he had a nervous cheeky grin on his face, but i could tell he meant well.

"oh hi- do you need something?" i asked, with a slightly tilted head.

he looked down at the empty seat next to me and back up at me. "erm- i was wondering if i could sit here." he chuckled lightly and he scratched the back of his neck.

"oh yeah! of course! i'm deryah!"

"well, hi deryah, i'm joshua- joshua grimaldi." he placed his hand and mines, giving it and eager shake. 

"nice to meet you joshua, this is my friend luna lovegood!" i tapped luna on her shoulder, in attempt to introduce her to joshua. she introduced herself, and we all started digging into dinner. 

after 30 minutes of getting to know each other, there was an abrupt entrance into the great hall. it was five slytherins. a platinum blonde boy, two brunettes girls with long hair, a tall brunette boy with wavy hair, and one more tall boy with golden mocha skin. they walked with a purpose and the all had blank expressions. getting a closer look, i noticed the mocha colored boy; he was the boy from the train. i looked over to joshua and cleared my throat. "who is the boy with the golden skin?"

"oh, that's blaise zabini! he plays quidditch for the slytherin team." 

"okay, thank you."

i turned back to the face the pack of slytherin teenagers, as i began to think. that was the arsehole with the wand stuck up his butt. i mean, yes i did bump into him, but he didn't even let me apologize! my thoughts were interrupted by a slightly hard nudge from the cheeky boy next to me. "do you fancy him or something?" 

"huh? erm- what?"

"it's been five minutes, you haven't taken your eyes off of him." 

"oh! merlin's no! i bumped into him on the train and he was very unpleasant!"

he raised an eyebrow, letting a humming sound erupt his throat. "okay, i believe you." 

i groaned and nudged his arm, rolling my eyes. "shut up."

"ow!" he screeched, rubbing his arm. 

"oh for merlin's sake, you know it didn't hurt." 

***

after dinner, luna and i were escorted to our dorms by joshua. we laughed, giggled, and somehow, it felt like we'd known each other since first year. turns out, we've shared all of our classes. how did i never notice him?

once i came out of my shower, i got dressed and began to prepare for tomorrow's school day. i went into my bedside table, preparing to pull out a book, until i saw an envelope. it was the one my father passed onto me at the station. the words " _don't open this until after dinner_ " played in my head repeatedly; filling me curiosity. i hesitantly grabbed the letter out of the nightstand. my father's initials were engraved into the pearly red wax holding the wrappings closed.

_should i open it?_

_what if it's something bad?_

_did he find someone for me to marry?_

_he's going to disown me-_

i could feel my chest start to grow tighter, as my mind conjures up all the things that could be written on the parchment i held in my palms. my breathing hitched, and i started to lose focus of everything around me. my heartbeat began to become louder and louder by the second. the noise began to be drowned out as the bathroom door opened, steam escaping from behind the door. luna came out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around her hair, and a smile on her face. i hadn't even noticed that she walked over to my four poster, until she placed a hand on my shoulder. "is everything okay?" her voice was soft and she had a concerned tone. 

"what? oh- erm- i think" to be honest, i didn't know if i was okay. 

"you were having a panic attack, are you sure you're okay?"

i looked down at the letter, and smiled softly. i didn't know what to say. 

"what's that?" 

"hm?"

"the envelope?"

"oh, i'm not really sure to be honest. it's also a long story."

"i have time" 

***

after what seemed to go on forever, the story finally came to an end. 

"merlin, that's a lot. i'm so sorry he said those things to you, and i'm sorry that you have no choice." luna placed her head on my shoulder, and began to hum softly. 

i let out a sigh and tapped the parchment against my palm. "then there's this-"

"are you going to open it?" 

"do you think i should open it now?" 

"yeah, if you want, i'll even open for you. if you'd like." 

"you'd do that?" 

"yeah, of course. let me hold it." i passed the letter her, as she lifted her head from my shoulder. she opened the wrapping and the smell of french vanilla coffee wafted into my nose. she pulled out a small piece of parchment, and reached for my hand. "we'll open it on three okay?"

i nodded my head and placed my hand in hers. "okay, i'm ready."

_"one"_

_inhale_

_"two"_

_exhale_

_"three"_

we opened the letter and i began to read it. 

_i'm sorry_

_please forgive me_

_if you find someone, i will allow you to marry for love_

_there are no requirements_

_love them wholeheartedly_

_if not,_

_you must accept your fate_

_i'm rooting for you_

**_dad_ **

i let out a sigh of relief and felt a tear escape my eyelids; leaving a blotch on the parchment. he said he was on my side. for the first time, he was on my side; he was giving me a chance too. "deryah? what does it say?"

"what?" 

"the letter? what does it say?"

"oh-" i quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and handed it to her. "here," 

once she finished reading the letter, she lifted her head and faced me. "i'm not sure, but i think this is a good thing?" 

"it is-"

"then why are you crying?"

"i guess, they're happy tears." i let out a soft chuckle, which soon transformed into a full giggle. "i'm free- sort of- but i'm free!!" i couldn't help but giggle loudly. luna's humming faded; allowing her to join me in laughing as well. i shot up from my bed, and began to dance and twirl around the room. "he's giving me chance to be free!!" i yelped and danced, not being able to control my happiness. i looked over at luna, and she had this cheeky smile over her face. i grabbed her arm, making her yelp. 

we danced, giggled, and talked all night. one thought remained in the spotlight in my mind;

_this was my chance to find love and be free, and i wouldn't let it go to waste._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just in case you guys wanted to know, joshua looks like joshua bassett. <3


	5. Partners

_i present to you..._

**_partners_ **

**_deryah's pov_ **

the first day of classes; the most dreaded day for all students. the day where teachers feel that is it necessary to assign five pages of parchment, and make it due the next day. 

sitting in the great hall for breakfast, i silently listened to the conversation going about between luna and josh. they'd gotten into a conversation about nargles; actually _luna_ had gotten into a conversation about nargles. i could barely focus, thinking about the letter and how i would go into such things. how does seek for love? or it is supposed to approach one naturally? 

a clear of one's throat pulled me from my train of thought. josh and luna were leaning over looking at my timetable, timetables i hadn't even realized had arrived. "we all have the same first three classes together, then we separate." luna beamed. josh shot her a smile, beginning a conversation about the timetables. i began listening for a few seconds, but then quickly zoned out, trying to get on the path of thinking i was on before. i guess today would be the day i start looking for the person i'd be spending the rest of my life with. 

***

as i headed to potions, my last class of the day, i felt relieved that i could finally get some sleep after this. i couldn't sleep so much last night, seeing that i had lots on my mind. looking at my bag full of work, i instantly took my words back and rolled my eyes. stopping in front of the classroom door, i prepared myself for what was behind it. i never really favored the study of potions, but somehow always managed to pass.

opening the door to the classroom, i stepped in, walking to sit at a desk far in the back. no one i knew was in this class, so i don't bother socializing. minutes later, professor slughorn came in and introduced himself. "good afternoon students, welcome to your last class of the day. today, i will be assigning you partners to work with for the rest of the year." the class groaned, knowing that professor would split us up in order to meet new people. ignoring the groans and whispers of the students, slughorn began a role call.

"granger, longbottom"

"potter, patil"

"parkinson, goyle"

"fontaine, zabini" slughorn announced, pointing in my direction. i looked over seeing him. blaise fucking zabini. 

i raised my hand, but before i could speak, he cut me off. "professor, are you sure there is no one else i can be paired with?" 

"no, i'm sorry. all pairs are final."

scoffing, he got up form his seat and plopped down in the chair next to me. subconsciously, i let out a scoff, transforming into a soft chuckle.

"something funny fontaine?"

"why do you care?" i snap, whipping my head in his direction. 

"because it's annoying as fuck-" he spat in response.

i rolled my eyes and began to listen to the professor. "today, i will be testing your knowledge, based on your previous years in potions. you and your partner will pick a potion, make it, and write two parchments long about it's uses and origin. this assignment is due next class, so you may open your textbook and use this time to start it."

that being said, i opened my textbook and began to search for a potion. 'polyjuice potion' was the one that stuck out to me. turning to zabini, i slid the textbook over to him so he could see which one i had chosen. "we can do polyjuice." he chose not to respond my words, hell, he didn't even give a nod. "fine then" i muttered, rolling my eyes. choosing to ignore his head placed in between folded arms on the desk, i carried on to speak aloud about my plans for the project. "so i think we should start with the hardest part, which would be finding the ingredients for the potion. it might take a while, seeing as some of the ingredients aren't on the shelves. maybe i could ask snape if he has any." obviously being annoyed, the boy let of a exaggerated huff, followed by a groan. he lifted his head, and placed it in his palm. his jaw clenched, showing that he was annoyed. something snapped in me, and i decided to egg on his annoyance. "oh i'm sorry, is there something wrong?"

"you won't shut up."

"oh- well, that sounds like a you problem."

"klutz" he muttered.

"wanker"

"whore." he spat, volume louder than before. 

taken aback by his response, i hadn't realized that the teacher freshly dismissed us. noticing other students leaving the half empty classroom, i stuffed my belongings in my satchel, bringing the strap over my shoulder. i didn't even have to look over at the git to notice the proud smirk that spread across his chiseled face. 

strolling down the hallway, i could hear a shuffle of footsteps speeding up behind me. to my surprise, the teen boy had ran into me, obviously not watching where he was going. i turn around to see a platinum blonde, with pale ivory skin and blue star colored eyes; his appearance was disheveled. the first few buttons of shirt unfastened, the sleeves of his button up rolled up, and his tie was loosen. his head of hair was slightly messy, probably from running his fingers through it. he had this sheepish but apologetic grin on his face. "sorry darling, i didn't see you there". 

once he was fully facing me, i realized who he was. he was a part of the slytherin pack. i smiled and nodded, letting him know that his mistake was dismissed. "no, you're all good" i quickly turned around, wanting to leave before he could start a conversation. i already had already been on one slytherin's hit list, i didn't need to be on another's. he obviously didn't read the room though. he ran to catch up with me, smiling while running through his fingers through his blonde mane. "what are you doing?" i questioned in curiosity. 

"well, most people would say i'm escorting you back to your common room."

i couldn't help quietly chuckle at the boy's words. he doesn't even know me, and yet, he's choosing to walk me back to my dorm. i glanced over at the boy, and began to observe with body language. he walked tall, but he didn't seem very intimidating. his hands placed in his pocket, his robe flowing behind him as he strut his way through the corridors. he didn't talk much, just stuck in his thoughts. 

arriving in front of the ravenclaw common room, i muttered the answer to the riddle, and opened the door. the boy didn't walk away though. he decided to cut the silence, leading with a snarky comment. "are you going to say thank you?" 

i whipped my head around looking at him, looking for a sign that he was being comedic. "i did not ask you to escort me back." 

"yeah, but your anxious expression, says you needed it." he had a smirk on his face; the same one zabini wore as i left the class. merlin, did they act similar; both seeming cocky and prideful.

"are you implying that i needed saving? because if you are, then you're wrong. i didn't need your help.

raising his hands and eyebrows in surrender, he let out a scoff while rolling his tongue in his cheek. "fine whatever." he whirled around, and began to walk away as i did the same. 

i stopped myself and called out for him. i wanted to know who he was, especially now that he escorted me back. "wait! i didn't catch your name."

he stopped in his track and looked over his shoulder. "just call me malfoy. and yours?"

"that's for me to know, and for you to find out." 

he let out a deep chuckle and began his movements again. "i guess we'll just stick with darling for now." he smirked, as he strutted away. i grinned walking into the common room and close the door behind me. the events repeated in my head, and i couldn't help but let my mind wonder about the boy. 

_malfoy_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just so you know, malfoy will not be a villain in this story. he will be a fluffy and flirty person. so don't be surprised if he's nice lol. but um sorry it took me so long to update. i'm fighting to get on a schedule lol. reminds me of how my school decided to change the schedule in the middle of the school year so now i have to get up even earlier. yayy :/ anyways hope you guys enjoy and share!


	6. My Blood is Just As Pure As Yours

_i present to you..._   
  
  


_**"my blood is just as pure as yours"**   
_   
  


**_narrator's pov_ **

for the rest of the evening, deryah couldn't help but ponder on the interaction she had with the blonde. she wondered how he could be so sweet, but hang around with someone so rude. she especially found it charming how he escorted her and called her darling, even though he didn't really know a thing about her. she couldn't help but think about the cheeky grins he gave when he bumped into her. though she had only met charming boy yesterday, she had anticipated seeing him again after class.

***

walking into the classroom, deryah noticed that her desk partner had not arrived yet. she sighed of relief, realizing that she wouldn't have to deal with his snarky comments just yet. once she sat down at her seat, she reached in her bag and began to grab the needed textbook, and more. before she could finish, she was interrupted by the tall blonde that was now crouched down at her side. "hello darling" he had a goofy grin on his face, and his attire looked the same as yesterday.

"since when do you have this class?" she inquired.

"since the first day of school," he replied.

"you weren't in class yesterday?" she pleaded, raising an eyebrow.

"i was occupied"

looking at his once again disheveled appearance, she let out a small chuckle. "may i ask what you do before you come to class that leaves your attire so messy and out of order?"

looking down at himself, he realized how unprofessional he looked. "oh, i have quidditch practice!" he chuckled, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

"that explains a lot." she laughed.

changing the subject, he attempted to get to know deryah. "so, when will you tell me your name?"

"i already told you, that's for me to know, and for you to find out." she joked. noticing the slight frown that now formed on malfoy's face, deryah caved. "fine i'll give you a hint." just as she parted her lips to speak, the professor strutted into the classroom. she shrugged, and malfoy arose and began to return to his seat.

"good afternoon class, i hope you all are almost finished your project, seeing as it is due next class. we will not be going into a lesson today, and you may use this class time to work with your partner." looking over deryah, the professor continued speaking. "well, those whose partners are here. anyways, before you ask, yes you are free to leave the classroom to go to the library. you may now begin." starting in on her work, deryah drowned herself in her textbooks.

***

thirty minutes into her work, deryah realized she needed a book from the library. not only that, her partner still hadn't arrived. deryah just accepted the fact that he wouldn't be joining her today. standing from her seat, she began her way to the library. the hallways were much more silent than she expected, but she didn't let it bother too much.  
now arriving in the library, deryah went to look for her needed textbook. when she couldn't find anything on the topic, she resorted to sneaking into the restricted area. it was very quiet; too quiet for her liking. coming around to the isle she needed, deryah gasped at the sight that was now spread in front of her; blaise zabini and some girl were shagging.

knowing it was wrong to stare, deryah still couldn't bring her eyes away from what she was seeing. he now stood in between the brunette's legs, his head nuzzled into her neck. he was placing small but sloppy kisses on her neck, causing small gasps and moans to escape her mouth. the brunette's skirt was lifted up, and her head was thrown back. from what deryah could see, blaise's hand was slowly trailing up the girl's thigh, making her desperate for his touch. deryah clenched her thighs, trying to bring herself back to reality, but she couldn't. for some reason, she had admired the way he moved. the way he could have her coming back for more with one touch, the way he knew just what spots to hit in order to make her go crazy.

snapping back into reality, deryah decided to clear her throat. this quickly caught the attention of the two teenagers. the girl looked annoyed, whilst blaise looked unbothered but it was obvious he was. the girl stayed seated on the desk, continuing to play with his tie, "is there something you need?" she spoke annoyed.

"actually, i need to speak to zabini." deryah spoke, clearly and unbothered. the brunette shot a look between blaise and deryah, jumping down to her feet when she noticed he hadn't looked away from deryah since she interrupted their rendezvous.

refusing to leave the room, the girl continued fix her appearance. "i'm not going anywhere."

deryah rolled her eyes, and looked back at zabini. his thumb was at his mouth, wiping it to rid of the girl's lipstick that now spread across his lips and neck. "fine then, i guess we will." without second thought, deryah rushed over to blaise, grabbing his collar and dragging him into another far off isle.

snatching away from sturdy grip, blaise began to protest. "get your hands off of me you filthy-"

cutting in, deryah argued before he could even finish his sentence. "what?! mudblood?! because let's not forget, my blood is just as pure as yours!" she shouted.

a dark chuckle escaped his throat as he rolled his tongue on the inside of his cheek. "oh no darling, of course i know that." he began to take big strides towards deryah, causing the bottom of her back to the desk. "i was going to say you filthy. little. whore." he was now towering over deryah's small figure, hands in his pocket.

before she could even think, deryah swung her hand around, bringing it in contact with his face. "fuck you zabini!" turning to leave the boy stranded, deryah was stopped, when his hand snatched her wrist, slamming her back into the desk. 

bringing his large hand to grasp her throat, blaise brought his face closer to hers; the smell of his cologne intoxicating her senses. "if you ever touch me again, i'll make your life a living hell." he hissed. dropping his hands from her neck, he turned and walked away, leaving deryah in silence to her thoughts. 

deryah brought her hand up to the area where his hand had been, feeling the ghost of his hand still there. she couldn't even speak, all she think was 'what the hell just happening?'. 

***

walking back to the classroom, deryah noticed malfoy was standing outside the class. it looked as though he was waiting for someone. "aw you shouldn't have!" she sang, placing an arm around his shoulder. he let out a big smile, responding with an arm around her waist. "so just to be sure, you're going to be walking with me from now on?"

"why is that a problem?" he questioned, giving her hip a slight squeeze. 

"no of course not. but considering you hang with zabini, won't you get banished?" she inquired sarcastically.

"who cares about zabini right now?"

deryah thought to herself, he was right. who was he to say who they could be friends with? even worse, who the hell was zabini to call her a whore? if anything, he's a walking, talking, penis.

she came back to the present, starting a conversation with malfoy that caused her to completely forget about the series of events that had played out earlier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay because i became a nervous wreck writing this chapter! let's not even mention that this is my first time writing smut! it's not full on smut, but it's just a small bit of sexual content, which means reader's discretion is advised. anyways, i love and appreciate you guys so much!


	7. Wild Thoughts

i present to you...

_**wild thoughts** _

__

**_narrator's pov_ **

deryah would be lying if she said she hadn't gave thought to what she had seen two days ago. the images galloped around wildly in her head, and she didn't stop herself from running with them. the vivid memories replayed in her mind, leaving her more inquisitive than ever. the images of him touching everywhere but where she needed, while she mewled in desperation, left her wondering. the way his hand snaked around her throat, slowly moving her hair out the way, giving him the access he needed to place small, sloppy nips on her pulse point. if he could make her moan without even touching her, what would happen when he finally did? though it infuriated her, deryah couldn't lie and say that he himself wasn't attractive. his golden skin, his chiseled jawline, and his paris brun eyes. 

no. no no no. deryah tugged herself from these thoughts, trying her best to lock them in a mental vault. she couldn't think about him like this; for merlin's sake, he did nothing but degrade her. but there was something about the degradation, that intrigued her; made her come back. deryah jolted up from her pillow, and reached in her bedside table to grab her journal. 

_where do i even start? i can't begin to even to profess how bad this is. the boy who treats me like shit, is also the one who is keeping me awake at night; **blaise zabini**. or should i say the arse who i just happened to bump into on the train? thinking back to the unfortunate interaction, makes me chuckle. i guess first impressions really do sick. _

_i was always told not to dwell on the past, but how can i when he is there everywhere i turn? my mind betrays me though. i can't seem to stop thinking about the things i saw and felt; how good he looked, how his hands felt as they wrapped around my throat. the way his paris brun eyes bore in my direction, just watching as i interrupted them. the way he looked at me; like a predator watching and waiting to make an attack on its prey. the deviously dark chuckles that escaped his lips, causing the hairs on my neck to stand up._

_no i can't do this to myself; i won't allow myself to forget who i am. i've seen this before; i'm supposed to fall for him, and he leaves me broken, still making me crave more of him. i refuse to put myself through this; becoming vulnerable and submissive for someone, only for them to shatter me into pieces. i care about myself too much to let that happen, but once again, my thoughts betray me._

_there was just something about his arrogance, the way he didn't care, and i cared too much; whether it may be showing up to classes late, or getting caught shagging in the library; it just didn't bother him. he was just- nonchalant; but that's what's pulling me to him. the idea of being with someone who doesn't care; the risk, the anticipation, i want it all._

_but the worst part is, no matter how hard i try to push the thoughts away, they come back bigger, stronger, and more repetitive. i need to stay away from him; i can't allow myself to get caught up with him, and end up losing myself. i will not let myself became another dependent female stereotype who needs a prince charming._

_the only way is to cut any chances of me seeing, or communicating with him._

_so that's it i guess; the solution to my problems._

_until next time,_

_**Love, Deryah** _

that being said, deryah closed her journal, placing it into the small table. fluttering her eyes close, deryah began to feel some of her thoughts subside, seeing as they had been written down. hopefully, tomorrow would be a better day.

***

waking up to the sun peeking through her window, as if she were asking for permission, never failed to put a smile on deryah's face. the way the sun placed kisses on her golden features, she did deryah's skin justice. the way the birds sang their song, inviting her to sing along or to come and join them outside. and the best of all, the way the gushes of wind tickled down her frame, cooling her of her midnight heat. 

raising her head from her pillow to sit up, deryah noticed that he peaceful roommate, hadn't awoken. the blue curtains were opened just enough for her to see that she hadn't moved from her spot. the blonde's lips were slightly parted, her soft snores sounding throughout the room. her arm crossed over her face, shielding her eyes from the anticipated lights produced by the sun. 

not wanting to disturb luna's slumber, deryah slowly and quietly let the balls of her feet hit floor. she quietly crept around her four poster, making her way to the trunk that sat idle at the end of her bed. taking her clothes and robe out for the day, she grabbed a towel as well, and made her way into the bathroom. retrieving the vanilla scented body wash from the shelf, deryah began to lather her body, setting some intentions for her day; she wasn't going to let anything interrupt her inner tranquility, and she definitely planned on keeping her words from the night before.

coming out of the bathroom, she noticed that her friend still hadn't risen from her slumber. this meant deryah still had time to venture to grounds alone before classes started. she made her way out of her dorm to the black lake, taking her favorite book with her as well

not even five minutes later, after she had gotten situated on the grass, draco came and took a seat at her side. deryah hadn't even acknowledged the boy, seeing as she was on her own personal journey with the book she had now clutched between her fingers. even after clearing his throat, draco still hadn't gotten her attention. not knowing what else to do, draco rapidly waved his hand in front of her face. "hello?"

"oh my- i'm sorry i didn't see you there!" she said, slightly jumping. 

"you don't say?" he joked sarcastically, tapping his chin. watching her roll her eyes, draco continued the conversation. "so i have two things for you this lovely morning, darling? or should i say deryah?" 

deryah snapped her up, discarding the book she clutched onto the grass. "how the hell did you figure it out so quickly?!"

a proud smirk crept onto draco's face. "have a little faith in me won't you?"

not even phased by his act, deryah let out a scoff and moved along. "i know someone told you. but moving on, what is the second thing you had?"

"well...me being the good mate i am,"

"oh no-"

"ouch! you don't even know what it is yet!" he defended. deryah placed her hands up in defense, letting the boy continue with his speech. "anyways! i was able to get you and your friends an invite to the slytherin party tomorrow night!" he was now sending deryah a beaming grin from ear to ear. 

deryah hadn't been to a party in a year or two. she always told herself that it wasn't her type of setting and that she wouldn't enjoy them. "no."

"wait, what do you mean no?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow.

deryah was now getting up from the grass, gathering her belongings. "what i said." she turned away from the tree, and began to scurry away. rising from his seated position, malfoy ran to catch up with deryah. he grabbed her wrist, causing a small gasp to escape her lips as she ceased her movements. he swung her around, making her look into his eyes. "what are you-"

"-just listen." he intercepted. "as your friend, i am going to be honest with you; you're kind of a buzz kill." before she could throw an argument, he brought his finger to her lips, hushing her. "shh!" deryah's eyebrows furrowed, as she attempted to push his hand away, only leaving it to cup her cheek. "if you want to make new friends, and expect to have fun, you have to be willing to do so"

"um, who said i needed new friends? or for that fact, that i wanted any?" she laughed.

disregarding her words, malfoy pursued his proposal. "it won't be the same without you!" he pleaded. 

"right because i'm _so_ popular" she scoffed, rolling her eyes. 

"i could introduce you to my friends!" his bottom lip was now forcefully quivering, as his blue eyes were pleading for her to say yes.

"i'd rather you not." she said, finally releasing herself from his grip. she turned and walked away until she heard him call out behind her."

"i didn't think that it would have to come to this, but you leave me no choice!" he shouted. deryah rolled her eyes, letting the previous words brush over her head; that was until the next words that fell from his mouth left her frozen. "i guess i'll just tell zabini how you really feel then!" he egged. 

"that's not funny malfoy" she warned, slightly turning her head over her shoulder

testing her words, he rushed off into the corridors, now screaming blaise's name. "zabini! zabini! deryah has something she needs to tell you!" 

running and pushing as fast as she could, deryah shouted after him. "he's lying! he's mentally ill! ignore him!" deryah noticed, a cut through in the crowd and decided to take it. she ended up running in front of the screeching boy, slapping her hand over his mouth. "fine! i'll come! just shut up!" she said through pants. 

"i'd thought you never agree!" he sang. "i'll see you at eight thirty tomorrow night! don't be late!" he gushed. 

"yeah, whatever" watching as he sashayed off, deryah rolled her eyes, and made her way to breakfast to inform her friends about the sudden event. 


	8. Sober

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: alcohol, slight mention of drugs, mentions of sexual assault, violence, slight sexual content. some scenes readers may find upsetting- if so, i advise skipping over it; discretion is advised.

**_TW: alcohol, slight mention of drugs, mentions of sexual assault, violence, slight sexual content. some scenes readers may find upsetting- if so, i advise skipping over it; discretion is advised. (_ ** _for those who skipped over the beginning notes **)**_

_i present to you..._

" **sober** "

**narrator's pov**

getting clothed for the party, deryah started to have second thoughts. deryah had always put herself a mindset where she told herself she would never find fun in going to a party. she wouldn't gain anything from them, and they were just irresponsible pastimes for those who had nothing going on. but yet here she stood, in a mini, black, shimmering clubbing dress. it was skin tight and the straps were so thin, they were practically non existent. she couldn't help pull and pick at the dress, trying to make her figure less of a spectacle. 

coming out of the bathroom, luna noticed her roommate's action and began to swat her hands. "stop picking at it will you? you look hot!" she was wearing something quite similar, but it was silver. 

"when did you ever have the time to get these? we've been drowning in schoolwork-"

"i've always had them. i do go out you know" she joked. deryah turned back to the mirror and examined her figure once more. she hoped that she wouldn't draw too much attention, especially the wrong kind. noticing how anxious her friend seemed, luna tried to change the topic to free her of her overthinking. "so josh said he'll meet us there, and what time does the party start?"

looking down at her locket, deryah shot her head back up at luna. "erm- fifteen minutes ago?"

"good! always be fashionably late to parties!" luna finished touching up her makeup, and grabbed deryah's hand. she strutted out of their common room, and headed to the dungeons. 

arriving at the slytherin common room door, they noticed a brunette standing guard. he was twirling his wand, whilst his back was pressed against the stiff brick wall. when he noticed the young ladies walking towards him, he straightened his posture in order to seem intimidating. "who are you?" 

"we're both here with malfoy"

**deryah's pov**

muttering the password, the boy stepped out of the way, allowing us to enter the common room. walking into the party, my eyes were immediately met by green strobes of light. the music was loud, and everyone either had a drink or was dancing. few were on the couch, but they looked like they were smoking or playing games. 

luna wasted no time leaving me to go dance. "i'll be dancing if anything." she winked. she vanished into the crowd, and i made my way over to the table to grab a drink. 

seconds later, a large pair of arms slithered around my waist. i turned to see draco with a sly smirk on his face. "enjoying the party so far?" 

i rolled my eyes, and rested my hand on his shoulder. "not even close bud."

he grabbed my hand and began to walk. "okay well, let's socialize. i'll introduce you to a few of my friends." before i had the to argue or protest, we were standing in front of a couch, occupied by a group of teens; the same slytherin group from the great hall. 

the vanilla skinned brunette, looked over at the two girls and smirked. "oi malfoy, you got yourself another shag?"

furrowing my eyebrows, i spoke out, defending him. "actually, no, i'm his friend." 

"oh, so this is the fierce little lady you've been talking about non stop?" he was now getting up from his spot on the couch, and making his way over to me. when he stood directly in front of me, he looked down at me. bringing my hand to his lips, he began to introduce himself. "i'm lorenzo."

"hello lorenzo, i'm deryah" i introduced. i looked around the couch, and they all began to say their names. 

"i'm onyx."

"pansy"

"you already know me" a dark voice interrupted; zabini. how the hell did i forget that he would be here? i watched as his eyes scanned my figure, stopping as they climbed back to my breasts. he clenched his jaw, and spread his thighs further apart. once again, i was recieving that same glare; predator and prey.

folding my arms, i respond flatly. "i do." eyes were thrown around the group, their gazes flickering at the tension between us. pulling me away, pansy and onyx offered me a drink and dance. 

following the two to the table, a golden liquid in a small shot glass was handed to me. i downed the drink, enjoying the stinging sensation as it went down; firewhiskey. they pulled me to the middle of the room, encouraging me to dance. 

after a few minutes, i gave in, feeling as the alcohol began to take it's course. the euphoric feeling took over my body, as i danced on pansy. one minute i was bent over, grinding on her front, as she took my hips and guided them. next minute, i was sandwiched between her and onyx, as they ground on my front and back, whispering sweet nothings in my ear. at one point, i could've sworn i felt pansy's lips brush across my nook between my ear, raising the hairs on my neck, but i didn't care; i was in the moment, and i was having the best time. 

after what felt like hours, i took a break from dancing, and clumsily sashayed over to the table. grabbing two more drinks, i drowned them, until i felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. but this time, it felt off; and of course, i was right. i whipped my body around, and my eyes were met with adrian pucey wearing a devious smile. "hello love," before i could think, his grasp around my waist tightened, causing a gasp to escape my throat. "don't be scared darling, i just want to show you something." 

laughing it off nervously, i tried my best to wriggle out of his grip. "no thank you-." he didn't stop there though, his rough hands began to explore my body. "adrian- please stop" i begged. i wasn't sober enough to fight harder, but that didn't stop me from trying. i tried my best of my ability to pull his off my body, but it was no use; i was screwed. his hand began to tease up my thigh, and grip hardly. and just as i tried to fight back, he was snatched away from me; i was saved and full of relief. from what i could hear, punches were being thrown, and glasses were being broken.

my consciousness slipped away further, and i began to feel the weight of my intoxication take over my body, causing me to fall out. i stayed motionless, as i lie on the floor, looking up at the ceiling. my lids became heavy, and i couldn't help but give in. and just like that, the room went dark.

**narrator's pov**

minutes later, deryah's body was lifted from the ground, causing her to jump awake and giggle. "whoa! watch it buddy!" she was being carried bridal style, but still, the strobe of the lights wouldn't let her make out who it was. she ran her hand up their arm, feeling the muscle as she on. "wow you're really strong and buff! oh my god, you must be really hot." she said through hiccups, slurring her words. she threw a glance over their shoulder and saw who she thought were onyx and pansy. "bye bye everybody! this guy's taking me away!" she giggled.

reaching his dorm, he placed her on his bed, and walked over to his wardrobe. he pulled out a large white button up shirt, and walked back over to the drunken girl. she was now completely drowned in slumber. he lifted her body and began to slowly unzip her dress. not knowing is she was wearing undergarments or not, he placed the shirt on her first, then slid the dress off under her. placing the silky duvet on her body, he dimmed the lights, and made his way back to the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: this is just a disclaimer and explanation on this chapter. i've been seeing a lot of people come at the author of slut because they claimed that she was "romanticizing" rape, sexual assault, and all the things that fall under that category. but just so you guys know, i would never do such, and if you feel like i'm ever doing that while reading one of my chapter, please let me know so i can make changes immediately. i love you guys, and would never want any of you to feel triggered or offended by anything like that. 
> 
> besides that, i hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, and i'm sending love to all my readers. xoxo


	9. "Get Your Fucking Hands Off Me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: mature content, adult language, slight sexual content, slight mention of blood, slight mention of violence and sexual assault. reader discretion is advised.

_i present to you..._

**"get your fucking hands off me"**

**narrator's pov**

usually, deryah would love to be awoken by the song of the birds, and the kisses of sun, but this morning, she had only one wish; that they would be swallowed whole by the earth. fluttering her eyes open, deryah greeted the sun with a sour scoff. her head ached majorly, and her mind was very fuzzy of the events that took place last night. slowly picking her head from the pillow, deryah was expecting to be met by her blue curtains with bronze stitching, but merlin was she way off. her eyes were greeted by a foreign setting; a silky green duvet, and a much more spacious dorm room. perhaps draco had stopped her from doing something irresponsible? or had she slept with a stranger? 

deryah's thoughts were immediately stopped when a door opened, soon followed by the steam and fog that escaped from behind it. deryah's jaw's became agape, as the sight unfolded in front of her eyes; blaise fucking zabini dressed in nothing but a towel around his waist. merlin, it couldn't get any better than this. his golden skin covered in water droplets, as they made their way down to his waist line. water droplets falling from his chin, but swiftly caught by his hand snaking up to his face. deryah's eyes couldn't help travel to the towel that was wrapped securely around his waist, hiding what was underneath. it was not doing a very good job, seeing as deryah could still see the outline of his dick. her eyes traced back up to admire his chiseled and toned abs; was everything on him toned? from his abs, she wandered up to his shoulders; his muscles prominent, just like the ones on his biceps. though he may have looked like a bit of a lanky boy, quidditch has obviously done him well.

"there's a muggle pill and water to drink it with on the table." he said flatly. 

sitting up, she turned to grab the water, when she noticed her change of attire. next, her eyes traveled to the other side of the bed and saw that it had been slept in. what if she was right? what if she did sleep with someone? and that someone was him? she pondered for a second. not really knowing how to ask, deryah jumped directly into the question, still stuttering while she tried to find the words. "did we um- you know- did we?" she questioned, gesturing her hands between the two of them.

"what? sleep together? of course not, have some faith in my fontaine; you were intoxicated and not able to give consent either way." he says, slightly shocked and offended. he starts changing the topic as he reaches for a pair of bottoms in his trunk "i need to ask you a question, just to be sure."

"okay shoot" she agreed, rubbing her eyes. she began to get up from the bed, making her way over to the loo. 

"do you remember anything that happened last night?" he inquired.

"not really, but i remember meeting your friends? why? did i do something stupid?"

"no. not at all."

"oh- well okay." deryah began to unbutton the shirt she wore, and examined her figure; her hips were sore and there were fades of red and irritated marks. she walked out the bathroom, shirt unbuttoned, and begin to play trivia with the young man. "are you sure i didn't do anything?" she pulled the shirt to the side and slid the waistband of her underwear down, exposing the skin of her hip. "my slightly bruised hip says otherwise." she said through a light chuckle. 

reacting immediately, blaise quickly, but not so quickly, pulls her over to the bed, between his legs. "shit- i'm going to kill that bastard." he muttered, the words softly running past deryah's ears. 

"what?" she confusingly inquired.

ignoring her words, blaise began to light tap the area. "does it hurt?" he must've hit a freshly bruised spot, because deryah jumped, hissing loudly.

"yeah, sort of" 

he continued examining her hip, softly caressing her skin. thinking it would go unnoticed, he let his eyes explore her figure. he admired her curves and dips, the way the sun kissed her smooth honey skin, how her ebony eyes were filled with fire, but also warm and comforting. that's when his eyes traveled down to her thighs; and suddenly, the lust took over his thoughts. his eyes pierced down at her thighs, and his mind began to wonder; the image of him in between her thighs, fucking her harder, not stopping even after she came. leaving her whimpering, and watching her legs shake, smirking while she struggled to walk. the image of her on the bottom as he straddled her, squeezing her eyes shut as she adjusted to his size. from her thighs to her breasts, but that didn't help either; more images flickering in his mind. he could only imagine the moans that would erupt from her throat as his teeth grazed her nipples, slowly tugging at them. the way she would mewl and squirm, as he placed wet kisses on her breasts, then blow, leaving the cool breeze to give her chills.

looking into her eyes, he stood up from his position, leaving him to tower over her. they stared into each other's eyes, deryah's skin burning as his hand stayed firm on her hip. they were both breathing heavy, and didn't dare to move. coming to some realization, blaise came back to reality and cleared his throat. "i have some things to take care of. i guess i'll see you in potions." he says, grabbing his suit jacket. he turned his back to her swiftly, and left her standing there clueless with a shut of the door. 

***

the whole morning, deryah had wondered what blaise meant. she had noticed his stare became fierce when she told him about the bruise. if nothing had happened, then why was he so angry? what was he hiding, and why couldn't she know about it? since she had a free period, deryah would spend her time trying to figure it. 

walking into the library, deryah spotted the same brunette from the night before. she had her head buried in a textbook, while she scribbled notes on the parchment beside her. deryah made her way over, and plopped down in the chair next to her. "hello darling."

lifting her head, a smile spread across pansy's face. "hello." she leaned forward, and placed a kiss on each of her cheeks. on her last kiss, she stayed a little while longer. she brought her face back, but stopped when she was only about an inch away. her eyes flickered between deryah's eyes and lips. 

deryah's cheeks warmed, but she remembered that she couldn't get side tracked, not right now anyways. she sliced the tension in half by asking the question that had been eating away at her. "um- do you know what happened last night?"

a certain memory had crossed her mind, but she wouldn't dare to mention it first. clearing her throat and sitting back in her chair, pansy answered with another question. "what do you mean?" 

"not really sure, there are bruises on my hip, and for some reason, blaise seems to be upset. did i miss something?" she inquired, continuing to probe.

pansy seemed to remember something, as she smoothly adjusted her posture. "oh that- well um adrian-"

"what about adrian?"

"he tried to get into your pants. well- your dress technically. but yeah, he kept touching you, even though you asked him to get off. i was running over to you, but then blaise beat me to it, and punched the shit out of pucey. i mean, there was glass everywhere, and there was blood that was dripping down his fist, but so no one would know about the fight, i healed it for him. and-"

"-that's why i have bruises on my hip. and also how i woke up in his room." 

"yeah, pretty much."

deryah now had a scowl on her face, but it was replaced but a smile as she placed a kiss on pansy's forehead. "you're a real lifesaver pans!" she now stood from her seat, and was walking towards the exit of the isle. 

"and a stress reliever too" pansy sang, sending her a wink. deryah winked back, and blew a kiss in response.

***

it had been five minutes of her wandering around the corridors, and deryah still couldn't find adrian. she swore she was going to hex him when she laid her eyes on him. hell, if she wasn't thinking, or if it wouldn't have been forbidden, she would've just went ahead and cast an unforgivable right there. she begin to come annoyed, as the hallways seemed to empty and quiet. "ugh, where the hell is he?!"

"where's who?" a dark voice called behind her leaving her to flinch; and of course, it was none other than blaise zabini. again.

"pucey, i can't seem find him for the life of me." she was still walking, and tried not to get distracted by his presence. 

blaise stopped in his tracks. "why the fuck are you looking for him?" he hissed, scoffing at her somewhat eagerness. his eyebrows were furrowed, and his fists were clenched. "what do you want from him?"

"i'm going to kill him actually, if you must know."

"so i'm guessing you know then?"

"no shit, and besides, why didn't you- what the hell happened to your hand?" she was cut off, when she noticed something on his hand. deryah lifted up his hand, and noticed that there was semi-fresh blood on it. "i thought parkinson healed your hand." 

snatching away, he answered quickly, trying to avoid any continuation of the topic at hand. "she did. i just got hurt in quidditch."

liar. she inched forward, trying to grab his hand again. "you're a really bad liar you know? so just tell me what happened to your hand? you kicked his ass didn't you?" 

"does it really matter?" he spat.

"when it was something might've had to do with me, yes, it does." 

"why do you assume it has something to do with you?" he had now turned towards deryah, leaving him to tower over her once again. 

"okay, fine. then why'd you do it?" she inquired.

"because i did." he swiftly turned away, and was now striding away from the conversation.

following him, deryah wouldn't stop asking until she received an answer. "there was obviously a reason, so just tell me." she pleaded.

"leave it alone fontaine." he warned. 

"just tell me, if it had something to do with me, why can't i know? just-" she begged, reaching for his shoulder.

"fucking hell!" he snapped, turning around. "it was the right thing to do, not everything fucking revolves around you! open your eyes, your not that special! i would've done the same for anyone else." he barked. 

"wow, okay." she scoffed. "you're a real fucking tease you know?"

"excuse me? i-" 

"oh cut the bullshit! you know i'm right. one minute, your hands are on my body, and trust me, those gazes don't go unnoticed either. then now, you're standing here in front of me, telling me i'm not special! make up your fucking mind zabini." she shouted. she brushed past him, making sure to hit him in the shoulder with every bit of power she has. 

he reached out and grabbed her wrist. "don't fucking walking away from me fontaine." he warned.

flipping her head to face him, she hissed at him. "i'll do whatever the hell i want. now get your fucking hands off me you bastard." with that being said, she snatched her hand from his grasp, and strutted off to her common room.


	10. "And that's not a threat darling, it's a promise"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: first things first, i just wanted to thank all of you for getting me to 1K reads, i love you so much and i'm sending hugs and kisses. second, i just wanted to say that i know it's a short chapter, but i needed to update. either way, i hope you all enjoy this chapter! xo
> 
> TW: mention of violence, slight mention of blood. mature language, reader discretion is advised.

_i present to you..._

**"and that's not a threat darling, it's a promise"**  
  
  


**narrator's pov**

trudging to her common room, deryah began to think; she made up her mind that she wasn't going to let zabini control who she interacts with, whether it may be good or bad for her. she was in charge of herself, and no one would stop her from doing what she wanted. changing her mind, she swiftly turned around, and made her way to the dungeons.

just a few steps away from the common room, deryah spotted the same girl from the library. only this time, she was nestled under adrian as he had her pressed against the wall. his hand were rested on her hips, and her hands were tangled in her hair as she twisted the curls with her fingers; boy, she really did get around. as his hands, dropped further down her hips, deryah's mind became less furry of what happened that night, the memories flashing in her head.  
  
  


_"don't be scared darling, i just want to show you something"_  
  
  


_"adrian- please stop"_  
  
  
  


the memories repeated in her mind, causing her to become angry at the sight of him. what gave him the right to touch her? the audacity he had. but she was also angry at herself for getting that drunk to the point where she had no control over what she did. why did she let herself go that much? and why did no one stop her?

pushing the persistent thoughts to the side, deryah decided to confront him, but when she had looked back, they were walking into the common room and the door shut instantly behind them. jogging swiftly behind them, deryah approached the door. just then, she realized that she hadn't known the password. and just to her luck, the same brunette boy from the party was exiting the common room. instead of questioning her, he recognized her face, and just held the door open for her. she gave him a humming sound and nodded, in thanks as she made her way to the main room.

walking in, she spotted adrian sitting on the couch; he had a smug look on his face, was chatting with his mates, while he had the girl's legs resting across his lap. deryah's mouth moved faster than mind, causing her to make a disturbance. "pucey!"

he turned his head, and the smirk dropped from his face for a millisecond before growing bigger. "back for more darling?" he sneered. gasps, whistles, and laughs were heard from his goons that stayed seated on the couch.

"you know what you did." she barked back. how could he find this funny or amusing in the slightest?

he turned back to his friends, resulting in them entertaining his foolishness more. he rolled his tongue in cheek, and began to clear his throat. he mockingly put his hands up in the air, and made a fake pouting face. "no i don't, i guess you'll have to enlighten me."

winging it, deryah went with the first thing that popped into her mind. "of course darling, but just remember than you asked for it." that being said, she pulled out her wand and cast a stunning spell. "stupefy!"

adrian flew in the air, and landed on his bottom as he slid into the hard wall. the smile was wiped from his face, and was now replaced by a hard scowl. he quickly arose from the floor, and pulled his wand from his waistband. the crowd had now stepped back in order to give the two some room. "you little bitch! sectumsempra!" he threw back.

the spell was immediately blocked deryah, causing her to fumble back a little due to the strong impact. what the fuck? he was trying to kill her; the audacity of the bastard! deryah wanted nothing more than to kill him on the spot, but she restrained herself; she would only go as far as stunning and disarming him. "expelliarmus!" she shouted, causing the boy's wand to fly off onto the floor. she strutted over to him, and said nothing. she had noticed blaise and draco run into the room, pushing through the crowd, but she wouldn't let them stop her from what was about to happen next. she cupped her hand on adrian's jaw, and whispered into his ear. "maybe this will help you remember" ceasing her words, deryah swung her foot forward, and kicked him in between his legs; that wasn't enough for her though. this time it was her fist; she swung her fist back, winding it up, and sent it forward with full force.

gasps and hisses filled the room, as the boy fell limp onto the concrete floor. deryah knew that the shock that trickled from her fist, up to her arm was going to be painful later on, but she was high off adrenaline right now, and that only egged her on more. she stood over the boy's body, and put him in his place. "you are _filth_ compared to me; you and your little goons. you _ever_ try that shit again, and i swear i won't just stun you, i will _kill_ you." she snarled. she crouched down next to his face, and lifted his chin to her level with her wand, causing the hair to fall from his face exposing his bloody nose. "and that's not a threat _darling_ , it's a promise."

giving his chin a small tap with her wand, causing him to grunt, deryah stood from over the boy and turned around; everyone was staring, and most were possessed with shock. no one said a word. she looked over and saw draco and blaise still watching her movements. she rose an eyebrow, and nodded her head, whilst giving a small smirk. draco's face was stunned, his jaw agape, and his eyes as wide as ever. blaise on the other hand, gave very little response, although deryah could still pick up hints from his body language and scoffs; he was pissed at her for going to see pucey even after her told her not to, but was proud and impressed to see her stand her ground. from the corner of her eye, deryah noticed the girl from before, rushing over his side. deryah only snickered and exited the common room.

***

not even seconds later, deryah heard pairs of shoes shuffling behind her. she didn't have to turn her head to know who it was; blaise and draco. "fontaine!" blaise shouted.

she halted in her tracks, and slowly rotated her body to face them fully. his face was flat, and he showed no expression. draco on the other hand, was grinning like a toddler on christmas. blaise didn't have to use his words to communicate, his body told it all. his hands were stuffed in his pocket, and his attire was the slightest bit disheveled. deryah didn't want to argue with him right now, because she felt that he was going to yell at her, or take her head off her shoulders.

merlin, was she way off; instead of giving her a mean scowl or throwing a snarky comment her way, he just scoffed letting it be followed by a small, but deep chuckle. he smirked, and sent a nod back her way. she didn't want to admit it, she was charmed by his smile; he had always placed a scowl on his face when they argued or spoke to each other, but this time, he smiled. going along with it, she teased him. "not today zabini" she joked, while smiling. she whirled around, and began to sashay back to her common room, the smile still prominent on her features.

seconds later, deryah felt draco's arm drop around her shoulder, and the goofy boy began to talk her ear off. "did i ever tell you why i love you?" he grinned.

giggling, deryah threw an arm around his waist. "no, you'll have to remind me!" she laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: i enjoyed this chapter honestly; i just needed her to beat him up, because men think they can get away with everything. but this is an early warning to buckle up, because next chapter is no joke; there will be full on sex. also shout out to ella for giving me the ideas for this chapter! go follow her on tiktok @/ _ellaweasleyx_
> 
> anyways, sending love to you all, and remember to take care of yourself! xoxo


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